Over the past couple of years we have been conducting an informal investigation of Expats and their Filipina partners as it concerned various aspects of a relationship. This has covered cities including: Manila, Cebu, Davao and of course Dumaguete. The purpose of this article is not to get anyone into trouble or name names. It is solely to bring out the rather surprising results of our study. Now this study involved over 200 men from a few different countries but mostly Americans and Brits as many of the foreigners (mostly German and Swiss) had limited English and made it impossible to communicate with. The only steady demographic was with the age of the men which were mostly in their 60’s and 70’s. There were a few outside this age range with men in their 50’s and younger but that was a very small age demographic. As for the background makeup of these men it really was an interesting melting pot of guys from all walks of life. Politically – conservative and liberals, Working – blue and white collar, drinkers, smokers, pot heads, you name it. While I didn't keep an actual tally, I will say that most of the men involved in this study would not necessarily be considered very cultured, sophisticated or even formally educated. Most though were very knowledgeable on many subjects from life experience, reading, the internet, etc…The few at the higher moneyed levels (blue and white collar) seemed to be very cultured, sophisticated, traveled, knowledgeable, educated and outside the majority percentage findings of the study that follows. Hey what can I say, that’s how it came out. The more moneyed guys had more stable and loyal relationships.
Those of you who have followed this blog are well aware of my reporting over the years about expats. As I have mentioned on more than a few occasions most of the men living in the Philippines came here either for financial reasons and/or for sex/relationships with young women. The majority of the men or women involved in this investigation were married or in serious relationships with many having gf’s and wives 40 to 50 plus years younger than themselves. A number of men also had partners that were within 20 years of their age.
Much of the information for this study was gained from informal discussions (which would not be a cause of alarm or suspicion) mostly from the women who tend to be more honest and forthcoming and since most of the questions were geared to the women. It was actually amazing how much people are willing to talk about. Percentages were generated by dividing the number of people actually answering a question in a specific category by the total number in the category. For the record, my wife did the interviews of the women. My wife is an incredibly astute person, educated, street smart, likeable and very easy to be with and get comfortable around. She had the extraordinary ability to put the women at ease and get them to divulge the things pertinent to the study. None of the girls were compromised as a result of this study and they had total anonymity as did the men.
1. Most of the gf/wives of these guys have or have had Filipino boyfriends on the side. This number was higher with women much younger but also included a large number of women within 20 years in age of their foreigner partners. The overall number was nearly 85% of women of both age ranges having cheated sometime during the relationship (infidelity was for this study was based on having sexual intercourse with someone other than your partner). In fact many of the women had Filipino boyfriends before embarking on their relationships with the foreigners and many of these women were encouraged to have relationships with foreigners for obvious financial considerations. Many women mentioned a lack of consistent sexual desire and/or sexual performance issues with the men. Some women mentioned outright disgust at the thought of having sex with their male partners. As for the men, less than 35% cheated on their gf/wives. The only real aberration was with relationships of couples that were within 10 years in age or closer. These reflected no cheating by the women and a miniscule amount by the men and were pretty much outside the findings of this study.
2. Over 75% of the women tried to get pregnant soon into the relationship/marriage in order to create more financial security for themselves; Often times the age of the man or their having had vasectomy’s prevented this from happening;
3. Over 65% of the women are either mentally and/or physically abused by their husbands;
4. Over 75% of the husbands are extremely frugal with their wives and keep them on as short a leash financially as possible;
5. About 25% live purely on Social Security, 60% have pensions supplementing their SS benefits and the 15% balance of men are financially well off (having SS, pensions and substantial savings) and would be well off in any country;
6. 100% of the women interviewed had extreme jealousy of their partners and concerns about their philandering despite a low number actually doing so.
7. Over 75% of the men smoked;
8. Over 75% of the men drink and over 40% of these men have drinking problems;
9. While only conjecture and guesstimates based on hearsay, 3% of the men practiced pedophilia. For this study having a sexual interest (not necessarily successful sexual contact) in boys and girls less than 10 years of age was the qualifier;
10. Over 75% of the men were either fat or obese;
Even though this study has taken place over many years and I have forgotten many of the people involved in this study I still enjoyed conducting it. Back in the states I was a very successful watchdog in a particular business sector so I guess I am naturally attracted to doing stuff like this. As an objective investigator, I also make no judgments on the outcome and try to stick to facts and logical conclusions. I think I have done that here.
General Facts: The Philippines are a poor country and foreigners are a way out of this poverty for many women giving them and their families’ possibility of a better life. Foreigners on the other hand have an opportunity to be with women whom they could only dream about having back in their home countries. And the men should really not complain. I mean the fact is, all most expats have to do is look in the mirror and they should count their blessing that anyone would want to look at them let alone be involved with them in the first place despite financial security they may offer!!!
The women bring beauty (eye of the beholder), sweetness, patience, innocence to a degree, obedience, and other positive elements to a relationship in the eyes of the men. While on the other hand, the foreign men generally bring a host of bad habits and lifestyle issues with them here including; excessive drinking, smoking, abuse, obesity, health, poor hygiene, body decay, dental, and so much more… and again they should be so lucky to have a woman willing to accept these issues. So it also should be no surprise that this acceptance comes with a price. In this study, that price was mostly in the form of infidelity but it seems loyalty (taking care of their men) was not compromised and was steadfast with the women despite their infidelity.
Lets make no mistake that there were a number of women in this study that have true larceny in their hearts and would do anything to get the financial benefits they seek including lying, stealing and even consider doing harm to their partners.